On our first visit to the grief counselor, he suggested that we journal. It could be a letter to our daughter, thoughts about our day, anything we wanted. I decided my journal would be a blog. To me if I spend the time writing the words instead of just thinking them, I truly need to know someone read them.
Most of my posts will be in the middle of the night when I cannot sleep lost in the silence and my unbearable grief.
The posts will have spelling mistakes, grammatical errors and possible a few swear words sprinkled in. Some may not even make any sense.
If anything I write offends you, stop reading.
This my journey that I am choosing to share. If it helps my friends have a better understanding of what I am facing, that would be great. If I end up helping another mom because something I say makes her feel less alone, that would be a huge accomplishment. If some of what I write honors and spreads my daughter’s kindness, that would make me happy. If this blog changes someone’s mind about organ donation, that would be the greatest gift.
This blog is for me. This is raw, this is personal. In no way does it reflect any other person’s or organizations’s opinions. Names may be changed, but you probably will know who you are in those stories.
Are we clear?
If you want more information about her tragedy go to www.caringbridge.com/visit/hayleymccutcheon